Confusion
After ‘Isda ba Ako?’ by Alma Quinto


Am I a fish?
Am I a bunny?
Am I a dragon
Without a body?

A stream of purple, dabs of jade. A nose of navy, a spot of indigo. A stretch of scarlet, yellow, and spotty orange, stitched with pink and cerulean.

The colors are bright, but they don’t help.

It blinks two mismatched holes, and tries to wiggle.

There are two things behind it, but what are they?

Fins? But there’s no water to swim in.
Ears? But there’s nothing to hear.
Horns? Maybe.

There’s a large lump on its side. Is it an eye?
But there’s nothing to see.

It thinks of fishes, swimming in the blue.
It thinks of bunnies, pointing ears on the green.
It thinks of dragons, flying over gold.

They are clear memories, but they don’t help either.

Fish swim.
Bunnies hear.
Dragons fly.

Why can’t it do any? Where is its head? Where is its body?

It doesn’t feel sad, only confused.

If it doesn’t know what it is, then where does it belong?